This past year my family has experienced several losses, and over the past month, several more. Family and friends. I know death is inevitable, but that doesn't stop the hurt that comes with losing someone.
I hear a lot, "Since you work in grief recovery, you must be good at dealing with loss." And to their surprise, I respond, "Not always."
Sure it's a lot easier to identify grief, to identify pain, but it still hurts. The hugest lesson I've learned is to allow the emotions to run its course -- not stifle it with alcohol. Or busy-ness. Or ignore it. Or pretend like it didn't happen. Or all the things I used to do to "move on." Part of moving on is treat our hurt like a friend - have compassion, empathy and spend intentional quality time to begin healing.
I still have a lot of hurts, breakdowns, meltdowns, and rough days. The difference now is that I can acknowledge and handle those emotions better, so I can share with others the healing and peace that comes with the hurt.
If you're struggling right now, please know that you're not alone. Please reach out to someone who can help, including me.